Dating

Dating can be lots of fun, but it brings its own challenges. How do you ask someone out? What do you do if they say no? Have you waited long enough before calling back? Will they call you back?

You may be worried that you’ll have a seizure while you’re on a date with someone you really like. Or, you may worry about how to tell someone that you have epilepsy and you may be concerned about how they’ll respond to the news.

It’s ok to be worried. Everyone — even people without epilepsy — worry that their dates won’t like them anymore after they learn their secrets or if they have bad breath while kissing.

It’s important to remember that you deserve to be treated well and that you will find someone who appreciates you for who you are – epilepsy and all.

When to bring up epilepsy

Generally, people say you should keep your first date lighthearted and fun and shouldn’t talk about ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends or mention epilepsy or that you have a crush on your date’s best friend.

Everyone is different though. If you’re really involved with your local epilepsy organization or if you’re worried that you may have a seizure on your date, it’s ok to bring up your epilepsy. If someone suggests a date activity that you think could cause a seizure, you should probably let them know why that’s not such a great idea and suggest an alternative location or activity.

For instance, if your have photosensitive epilepsy, you might suggest dinner instead of clubbing. Other good dates can be local scavenger hunts (check the phone book), pottery painting, concerts, plays or movies.

If your seizures are under control, you can feel free to only mention your epilepsy after you’re officially going out or when you feel comfortable enough to talk about your epilepsy.

Bringing up epilepsy to a girlfriend or boyfriend is a lot like talking to your friends. You may want to talk about why you wear a Medical Alert necklace or explain why you take medicine every day.

Horror stories & success stories

Chances are, you’ll find that the person you tell – whether a long-term boyfriend or girlfriend or a new date – will take your epilepsy in stride. They’ll probably ask a few questions and that’ll be life. But even if they react badly, remember that you’re still you and you’re worth more than a date.